Going from one to two..

 

I heard a famous comedian recently say "having one child is like owning a pet and having two is like running a zoo". I couldn't actually describe it better myself! 

How did I find one child hard? I remember saying out loud "this is the hardest job in the world".. seriously? How? Don't get me wrong I wasn't blessed with one of those "good" babies who would happily just lie there, but compared to two? PIECE OF PISS!

Now, I stupidly went for a smallish age gap of 23 months. I really didn't think that one through as I ended up having both at home 24/7 7 days a week. There was no school or pre school break to "sleep when baby sleeps". Oh no, it was constant. Harrison (my youngest) didn't sleep well. Actually, HE slept well but I couldn't sleep with a baby attached to my boob all night long. He was also a baby that liked to be jigged. I was determined not to jig this time round but that failed. Why is it babies are happy when you are jigging stood up but as soon as that bum hits the chair they scream again? Why??? All I can say is thank god for slings. I have no idea how mums cope without them, I'd have had a breakdown.

When I went from one child to two I remembered what another mum said to me "you will have an overwhelming sense of guilt". She was so true. You feel guilty you are not giving your eldest the attention they are used to and you feel guilty for not even looking at your baby that has been in the sling for a few months, oh and don't even get me started on the completion of their baby book!

Whilst the baby days are hard, I hate to break it to you, but when the youngest is on the move it gets a whole lot harder. Harrison walked at 10 months, 10 months! I wanted a baby that sat still contently for well over a year, I was promised I would not get two children the same.. Bollocks, you can most definitley end up with two lively children that do not want to sit still, EVER!
 
I was very lucky in one way as Ollie, my eldest, was very tolerant, kind and never retaliated when everything he was playing with was destroyed by Harrison.What was slightly more tricky was the fact Harrison was a hitter. I'd never had a hitter. Infact, I was adamant that it was kind gentle parenting that had produced such a loving boy. Rubbish! If hitting is their thing, there is bugger all you can do about it. I desperately searched for books giving me tips on how to raise loving siblings but they were all based around the eldest one hitting the youngest and not the other way round. We tried the "don't pay attention to the hitter and give all your attention to the victim.. Oh poor ollie, did that hurt?". Harrison was a year old, he's not going to give a damn!
The only option was to watch them constantly to stop a serious injury happening and, believe me, although tiny, Harrison was very strong!

So the first couple of years consisted of a trashed house (no time for housework as I was stopping eldest child getting injured) alot of dry hair shampoo (no time for hair washing as I was stopping eldest child getting injured) and being a sleep deprived mess. There was even one morning I was that tired I opened the door to the postman with my boob still out from feeding Harrison, that was slightly embarrassing!

During the really hard times when both decided to kick off I'd bundle them into the car and drive, gosh the mileage I must have covered (sorry ozone layer). Because I realised I was probably slightly unsafe on the roads I would drive round the block and then park up on my drive to sleep. I have a feeling my neighbours thought I was a tad nuts but I didn't care, I just needed sleep!

Looking back I actually don't know how I coped as it was just so hard. Having a friend who had non sleeping children helped as we would often have a play date at 8am just so we could sit down. Now the boys are 6 and 4 its so much easier. Even though they still fight they also play nicely which is lovely to see and makes all this hard work worth it.

Would I do it all again and add another baby into the mix? Hell no! I'm not that crazy....